Tuesday, October 31, 2006 halloween.
Riiight.
I wanted to change this layout because October's ending and everything.. but here's what I've done..
nothing..
I wasted precious internet hours searching for the right layout but then i didn't end up with anything. I guess that's just the way it is. I can't find the 'me' in other blogskins, so I tried hard to create myown template. Nothing happened, as you can see.
Anyways, I talked to my big brother this morning. It was nice hearing from him again. We exchanged blog links. I can't really type anything at the moment, I'm currently hungry. I haven't eaten lunch. >_<
The past few days were usually weird. Michael and I were in a sort of misunderstanding but then we're okay now. I guess all we really need is some time to talk about some stuff. I missed those times when we just sit down and have a nice talk about the stuff that's happening to our lives. Time flies so fast. We'll be having our 9th month anniversary. woohoo!! We are so happy because even though we have misunderstandings, we are still strong and are still together. I wish it would stay this way. Hee!^^,
It's so hot here. Grr! I'm in my mom's room and the air's like,, not circulating. It's like I could suffocate any second.
Last week wasn't all happy. Michael's cousin died. T_T I feel so sorry for his cousin's family because he was only 12 and he had only one brother. It was very sad but then I wasn't there to make him feel better (although he's not that sad... as in sad about it). He just felt bad and I wasn;t even there to cheer him up.
Hm.. I can't think of anything to type down now. Haha. I guess I'll be back next time.
Bye.
I wanted to change this layout because October's ending and everything.. but here's what I've done..
nothing..
I wasted precious internet hours searching for the right layout but then i didn't end up with anything. I guess that's just the way it is. I can't find the 'me' in other blogskins, so I tried hard to create myown template. Nothing happened, as you can see.
Anyways, I talked to my big brother this morning. It was nice hearing from him again. We exchanged blog links. I can't really type anything at the moment, I'm currently hungry. I haven't eaten lunch. >_<
The past few days were usually weird. Michael and I were in a sort of misunderstanding but then we're okay now. I guess all we really need is some time to talk about some stuff. I missed those times when we just sit down and have a nice talk about the stuff that's happening to our lives. Time flies so fast. We'll be having our 9th month anniversary. woohoo!! We are so happy because even though we have misunderstandings, we are still strong and are still together. I wish it would stay this way. Hee!^^,
It's so hot here. Grr! I'm in my mom's room and the air's like,, not circulating. It's like I could suffocate any second.
Last week wasn't all happy. Michael's cousin died. T_T I feel so sorry for his cousin's family because he was only 12 and he had only one brother. It was very sad but then I wasn't there to make him feel better (although he's not that sad... as in sad about it). He just felt bad and I wasn;t even there to cheer him up.
Hm.. I can't think of anything to type down now. Haha. I guess I'll be back next time.
Bye.
the time was.. 2:43 PM
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Thursday, October 26, 2006 alevort..
i'm currently in this computer shop. today's our examination day.. i can't actually say that i did great because the questions were hard. aswering those stuff made me think about college.. what if i don't make it? what if i fail??T_T i certainly don't want to study here in laguna because i wanna study in manila. *sigh* and if i ever get the chance to study in manila, where would i go home to? i don't wanna stay in my grandparents' place. huhu! i wanna go home to laguna, no matter how hard it takes! i don't care if i come home tired. i just wanna go to manila and come back to laguna. i wanna try to take a shot in the University of Sto. Thomas because i like that school and i know they guarantee education. I also wanna take exams in the Philippine Women's University because my aunt told me that they offer a great facility in Fine Arts (and my boyfriend goes there.. so there's enough reason).
anyways, enough about college talk.. (4 of my schoolmates came in teh shop.. but i'm not very fond of them so i'll ignore them)
i wanna go to callalily's gig. i heard that they'll have one at the end of the month, i'm not sure where. haha. i miss them! i wanna see kean live and i wanna see him near. haha! i am so depressed to have missed their gig last October 21st. *sigh*
in accordiance with me and my boyfriend, i am still hoping that nothing bad happens. i know i trust him but then there's this big freaky thought in my head that something bad in taking place. i know it's not right because if i love him, i should trust him.. gah!! enough!!
you are the heart that keeps me alive.. you are my sanctuary..
anyways, enough about college talk.. (4 of my schoolmates came in teh shop.. but i'm not very fond of them so i'll ignore them)
i wanna go to callalily's gig. i heard that they'll have one at the end of the month, i'm not sure where. haha. i miss them! i wanna see kean live and i wanna see him near. haha! i am so depressed to have missed their gig last October 21st. *sigh*
in accordiance with me and my boyfriend, i am still hoping that nothing bad happens. i know i trust him but then there's this big freaky thought in my head that something bad in taking place. i know it's not right because if i love him, i should trust him.. gah!! enough!!
you are the heart that keeps me alive.. you are my sanctuary..
the time was.. 11:23 AM
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Tuesday, October 24, 2006 can't think of a title.
hmm.. i was about to give up yesterday. thinking about him made me stop. he learned how to lie to me. he learned how to ditch me. but then io can still say that this bad thing is an influece he got from playing ragnarok. hmp! that game is to addictive i don't even know why. it's been around for 3-4 years and guys still couldn't stop raving about it.
well, he said his deepest sorry. i am yet again giving him another chance to prove that nothing changed between the both of us. i wish he will not blow this off. i believe him and i understand that he is undergoing a critical addiction towards that game like he did when he started playing ran online. i can't grab him from his friends and he can't grab me from mine. we both know that and we have accepted that fact long before.
this is one heck of a relationship. but then whatever happened, we're still standing and we're still in love. he is happy with our situation, at least we are not that weird because we also have problems. i know that we're gonna make it big. we're gonna betogether for a loooong time. i'll place my bet on that.
i don't wanna give him up and he doesn't wanna give me up. so happy!!
and if i'm dreaming' please don't wake me up coz i'll go insane.. without you near me.
i watched the craeons/callalily MYX live and aaron ricafrente's MTV homecoming. they're both great.
after that i watched kamikazee's dyan banda on MYX.
hehe..
i'm getting sleepy.
i have school tomorrow.
i'll see you whan i see you..ü
well, he said his deepest sorry. i am yet again giving him another chance to prove that nothing changed between the both of us. i wish he will not blow this off. i believe him and i understand that he is undergoing a critical addiction towards that game like he did when he started playing ran online. i can't grab him from his friends and he can't grab me from mine. we both know that and we have accepted that fact long before.
this is one heck of a relationship. but then whatever happened, we're still standing and we're still in love. he is happy with our situation, at least we are not that weird because we also have problems. i know that we're gonna make it big. we're gonna betogether for a loooong time. i'll place my bet on that.
i don't wanna give him up and he doesn't wanna give me up. so happy!!
and if i'm dreaming' please don't wake me up coz i'll go insane.. without you near me.
i watched the craeons/callalily MYX live and aaron ricafrente's MTV homecoming. they're both great.
after that i watched kamikazee's dyan banda on MYX.
hehe..
i'm getting sleepy.
i have school tomorrow.
i'll see you whan i see you..ü
the time was.. 10:42 PM
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Friday, October 20, 2006 siopao asado.
hmm..it's midnight and i'm still awake.. i have school tomorrow. blah! bahala na! matagal na din akong hindi nakakapag online!
anywaysh, friday nanaman! lolz! a lot of stuff happened yesterday, considering the fact that i cried again! >_<
i though i couldn't hang on any longer. that thought haunted me for a mere 20 minutes. it was the saddest though so it made me cry more. haha! see how weird i am? i don't wanna cry, but thinking about reality made me. i cried a bit hard to show that i am really depressed with the matter! and he comforted me. i don't expect him to cry with me, that's like expecting the moon to give off it's own light.
*ssshh*
i can hear a dog barking from outside. haha. wala lang!!
looking around, i see a lot of my mom's stuff. no one's texting me na so i expect for them to be asleep. kawawa nman ako.
michael didn't text me whether he's home or not. i'm not that worried because i trust him and i know that he'll be safe home..
he just forgot to text me, that's all!!
wala xang pasok ngeon, it's friday.
how i wish i wouldn't have to go to school today. T_T
i still have this aftershock kind of feeling about the post in callalily's yahoo!group. sobrang nalungkot ako coz i never thought that the band wouldn't have such negative feedbacks despite their hardwork and patience. it's not their fault nman eh! and i don't wanna blame anyone else..
sana naman that girl tried to think before she typed. daming na offend eh,.,
anywaysh, friday nanaman! lolz! a lot of stuff happened yesterday, considering the fact that i cried again! >_<
i though i couldn't hang on any longer. that thought haunted me for a mere 20 minutes. it was the saddest though so it made me cry more. haha! see how weird i am? i don't wanna cry, but thinking about reality made me. i cried a bit hard to show that i am really depressed with the matter! and he comforted me. i don't expect him to cry with me, that's like expecting the moon to give off it's own light.
*ssshh*
i can hear a dog barking from outside. haha. wala lang!!
looking around, i see a lot of my mom's stuff. no one's texting me na so i expect for them to be asleep. kawawa nman ako.
michael didn't text me whether he's home or not. i'm not that worried because i trust him and i know that he'll be safe home..
he just forgot to text me, that's all!!
wala xang pasok ngeon, it's friday.
how i wish i wouldn't have to go to school today. T_T
i still have this aftershock kind of feeling about the post in callalily's yahoo!group. sobrang nalungkot ako coz i never thought that the band wouldn't have such negative feedbacks despite their hardwork and patience. it's not their fault nman eh! and i don't wanna blame anyone else..
sana naman that girl tried to think before she typed. daming na offend eh,.,
the time was.. 1:25 AM
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Thursday, October 19, 2006 kakalungkot..
minsan talaga..some people need to really adjust their values.
here's a post from callalily's yg entitled.,.
" THE WORST MALL TOUR!!! EVER!! KASAMA ANG "callolily" "
ganito kc un...grabe nakakaiinis! !!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!we wcthd a mall tour of CALLOLily ay CALLALILY pla asar dun.. una plng.. 1st ayw kmi ppsukin sa mga bmli ng cd nla dun s dasma kht mron o nkbli kmi ng cd ung orig ha.. kylngn bbli k mismo s mga organizer ng event n un kya summa kmi s mga MBBAHONG POSER n ROcker dun s dasma... lm nyo kaasr din sla!!! 2nd pinaikot kmi ng mga guard ng ROBINSON's pra mkpzok kmi tpos la rin nngyri... buti p si manong Xstatic (mobile n gmit s show) pinapzok kmi!!! tnks kuya 4 ur gudness!grbe! 3rd .. after ng show edi autogrph sesyon n... grbe.... we've waited so long tpos hndi rin kmi pnprma... bigla kmi hnarngan ng mga guard dun sb tpos n... dalawa nlng kmi dun d p tnpos!!tpos tinwag nmin sila tpos dedma p rin!!! feeling sikat at gwapo kht hndi p!!! buti p si LEM kht cosmetically behind, gumwpo p rin...kc my PUSONG BUSILAK!! YES! kc kht hinhla n sya ng road mngr nla ay pumiglas at pinirmhn ung dmit ng hipag ko!!! nkta n LEM ung effort ng hipag ko n umkyat s stage kht mtaas!! mbti at nkpgsign sya!!! at ngsori p!! we LOVEYOU LEM!!! mwaah!! e ung iba tintwg mo n dedma at tumakbo p!!! buti p ung JTC(join the club) kht "rising star" plng cla, cla p mismo ang llpit s fans. kng hndi p kmi pmnta s bckstage dp nla pprmhn..hnd nga lht nkprma eh!!! lm ko n my gig p cla ppnthan kso sna tnpos n mna nla ung trbho nla sa cavite... lm nyo mbti p rin ung 6CM (6cycle)cla my recordng p pro tnpos nla ung show n mgnda at msya pra s mga tao!! SNA MPUBLISH TO S MGA MAG. HOY!! mgplet kyo ng dmit bgo pmnta ng ibng gig.. kc mla SOP hnggng DASMA yn p rin dmit n suot nyo!!! yuck!!! mbti p ung knta ni paris hilton!!! my msg at seksi p. kyo non-sense!!! pareho p nmn tyo tga-uste!!! kmi tigers kyo pussycat dolls!! dont cha baby!!! hndi nmin kyo sinisiraan, were fans ryt??? were just saying to all 5 of u wat we felt and exprienced during that show!! sori nlng!!! hndi nmn kmi kwalan s mga fans nyo kzo mlking bgay ung gnwa nyo smin!!! drama ko noh!!! kyo din!!! biruin mo un akyatin k n ng hipag ko 4 just a sign of u dedma p rin!!! puta!!! sori ha?? ung SEXBOMB pinanood ko inacommodate ung mga fans nila at seksi p.. s knla nlng ako!! wholesome at mrunung gumiling.. at ung ngbbgy ng poster!! sna nxt tym wg n mngyri s iba un!!! wg lki ulo!!! kht mlki n ang ulo!! nga pla dpt mg-tnks kyo ky JESUS kc nkabot kyo dyn kht ppaano... i beliv in karma mga dudes... sna mbilis din.. tnks... sori tlga....sori tlga... pro joke lng...
so bale..
mahaba..
kakalungkot noh??
and to think na babae nag post nian..
and to think na tga USTe ung nag post nain..
a school na sobrang nirerespect ko..
hai naku talaga..
here's a post from callalily's yg entitled.,.
" THE WORST MALL TOUR!!! EVER!! KASAMA ANG "callolily" "
ganito kc un...grabe nakakaiinis! !!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!we wcthd a mall tour of CALLOLily ay CALLALILY pla asar dun.. una plng.. 1st ayw kmi ppsukin sa mga bmli ng cd nla dun s dasma kht mron o nkbli kmi ng cd ung orig ha.. kylngn bbli k mismo s mga organizer ng event n un kya summa kmi s mga MBBAHONG POSER n ROcker dun s dasma... lm nyo kaasr din sla!!! 2nd pinaikot kmi ng mga guard ng ROBINSON's pra mkpzok kmi tpos la rin nngyri... buti p si manong Xstatic (mobile n gmit s show) pinapzok kmi!!! tnks kuya 4 ur gudness!grbe! 3rd .. after ng show edi autogrph sesyon n... grbe.... we've waited so long tpos hndi rin kmi pnprma... bigla kmi hnarngan ng mga guard dun sb tpos n... dalawa nlng kmi dun d p tnpos!!tpos tinwag nmin sila tpos dedma p rin!!! feeling sikat at gwapo kht hndi p!!! buti p si LEM kht cosmetically behind, gumwpo p rin...kc my PUSONG BUSILAK!! YES! kc kht hinhla n sya ng road mngr nla ay pumiglas at pinirmhn ung dmit ng hipag ko!!! nkta n LEM ung effort ng hipag ko n umkyat s stage kht mtaas!! mbti at nkpgsign sya!!! at ngsori p!! we LOVEYOU LEM!!! mwaah!! e ung iba tintwg mo n dedma at tumakbo p!!! buti p ung JTC(join the club) kht "rising star" plng cla, cla p mismo ang llpit s fans. kng hndi p kmi pmnta s bckstage dp nla pprmhn..hnd nga lht nkprma eh!!! lm ko n my gig p cla ppnthan kso sna tnpos n mna nla ung trbho nla sa cavite... lm nyo mbti p rin ung 6CM (6cycle)cla my recordng p pro tnpos nla ung show n mgnda at msya pra s mga tao!! SNA MPUBLISH TO S MGA MAG. HOY!! mgplet kyo ng dmit bgo pmnta ng ibng gig.. kc mla SOP hnggng DASMA yn p rin dmit n suot nyo!!! yuck!!! mbti p ung knta ni paris hilton!!! my msg at seksi p. kyo non-sense!!! pareho p nmn tyo tga-uste!!! kmi tigers kyo pussycat dolls!! dont cha baby!!! hndi nmin kyo sinisiraan, were fans ryt??? were just saying to all 5 of u wat we felt and exprienced during that show!! sori nlng!!! hndi nmn kmi kwalan s mga fans nyo kzo mlking bgay ung gnwa nyo smin!!! drama ko noh!!! kyo din!!! biruin mo un akyatin k n ng hipag ko 4 just a sign of u dedma p rin!!! puta!!! sori ha?? ung SEXBOMB pinanood ko inacommodate ung mga fans nila at seksi p.. s knla nlng ako!! wholesome at mrunung gumiling.. at ung ngbbgy ng poster!! sna nxt tym wg n mngyri s iba un!!! wg lki ulo!!! kht mlki n ang ulo!! nga pla dpt mg-tnks kyo ky JESUS kc nkabot kyo dyn kht ppaano... i beliv in karma mga dudes... sna mbilis din.. tnks... sori tlga....sori tlga... pro joke lng...
so bale..
mahaba..
kakalungkot noh??
and to think na babae nag post nian..
and to think na tga USTe ung nag post nain..
a school na sobrang nirerespect ko..
hai naku talaga..
the time was.. 9:52 PM
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Sunday, October 15, 2006 One Hell of a Roller Coaster..
Life for me is weird.. so as my relationship with my boyfriend.. but it's weird in a good way.. I may believe this cannot be it, because I'm only 15. Who in the world would have a steady relationship and is sure who to marry in their 15th year? As for us, whatever we have will last but it will last longer than anyone expects. It may not be forever, but i can assure you it is always.
I don't know what happened and how it happened and why it happened, but I know by that moment my life rocked! I am thankful for what happened, at least now my mind is at rest. He gave me assurance as well as hope. Hope in a way that I once again believe that we will be together longer than what others expect. I know some people might not believe in us, in the fact that he'll be 17, I'm fifteen, he studies in college, I am a high school student, I don't know whatever he is doing over there.. But then last night, he gave me reassurance and he brought my trust back to him.
'Sometimes the truth hurts.'
A quote I truly believe in. I cried, it was no big deal. The big deal is what he told me. The big deal is what I believed to be true, and yes, I was right. But then in the fact that he stopped it, makes me realize how much he doesn't want this relationship to end.
I know you may think that what I'm saying now is gibberish.. I am sorry, but all I can do is type down what my head wants me to say. As for last night, I spoke everything that I have to say. I opened to him everything, with him thinking that I can't understand what I'm saying. I was dizzy, yes, but I know what I'm saying. I know that what I said was true. I know that I want to hear the truth. I know I want him to tell the truth. I want to know what really is happening and what really happened. I want to see from his eyes the truth. I want him to stare at mine and say it all, knowing that with him staring at me, will be completely difficult for him to say a speck of a lie. I can see from his eyes that he never said a single lie.
I believe that if ever we broke up, it's my fault. If ever there is something wrong, I would most likely be the one responsible. It's not that I don't believe in him, it's because of my previous relationship. I trusted my past, and all it did was hurt me more. But then Michael was there, and he comforted me. He made me smile the way others don't. He made me laugh despite the point that I was really crying at that time. He created a bond that tied us even though were not in a relationship yet and neither of us know if there is a chance that we will.
Anyways, I forgot most of what happened last night. I forgot most of that I said, but I know even though I forgot most of them, he wouldn't because the most normal person that time was him. He listened as I spoke and vice versa. I loved him and he loved me back.
He asked me if we are gonna make it until our anniversary, which is 4 months to go.
What did I answer?
I told him,
We're gonna make it our first year, and we will make it no matter what. Because we are not gonna make it our first year only, we're also gonna make it through the second, third, fourth, and so on..
ü
I don't know what happened and how it happened and why it happened, but I know by that moment my life rocked! I am thankful for what happened, at least now my mind is at rest. He gave me assurance as well as hope. Hope in a way that I once again believe that we will be together longer than what others expect. I know some people might not believe in us, in the fact that he'll be 17, I'm fifteen, he studies in college, I am a high school student, I don't know whatever he is doing over there.. But then last night, he gave me reassurance and he brought my trust back to him.
'Sometimes the truth hurts.'
A quote I truly believe in. I cried, it was no big deal. The big deal is what he told me. The big deal is what I believed to be true, and yes, I was right. But then in the fact that he stopped it, makes me realize how much he doesn't want this relationship to end.
I know you may think that what I'm saying now is gibberish.. I am sorry, but all I can do is type down what my head wants me to say. As for last night, I spoke everything that I have to say. I opened to him everything, with him thinking that I can't understand what I'm saying. I was dizzy, yes, but I know what I'm saying. I know that what I said was true. I know that I want to hear the truth. I know I want him to tell the truth. I want to know what really is happening and what really happened. I want to see from his eyes the truth. I want him to stare at mine and say it all, knowing that with him staring at me, will be completely difficult for him to say a speck of a lie. I can see from his eyes that he never said a single lie.
I believe that if ever we broke up, it's my fault. If ever there is something wrong, I would most likely be the one responsible. It's not that I don't believe in him, it's because of my previous relationship. I trusted my past, and all it did was hurt me more. But then Michael was there, and he comforted me. He made me smile the way others don't. He made me laugh despite the point that I was really crying at that time. He created a bond that tied us even though were not in a relationship yet and neither of us know if there is a chance that we will.
Anyways, I forgot most of what happened last night. I forgot most of that I said, but I know even though I forgot most of them, he wouldn't because the most normal person that time was him. He listened as I spoke and vice versa. I loved him and he loved me back.
He asked me if we are gonna make it until our anniversary, which is 4 months to go.
What did I answer?
I told him,
We're gonna make it our first year, and we will make it no matter what. Because we are not gonna make it our first year only, we're also gonna make it through the second, third, fourth, and so on..
ü
the time was.. 4:42 AM
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Saturday, October 07, 2006 so tired...yet again..
it's been a long while since i last created a post here..T_T well, some people asked me how my game turned out,, well, i lost my first game, then the next day, i won..twice.. then i lost my last match and i got defaulted..it was okay since i won twice over 4 games..
i'm so tired.. this week was so exhausting. we had a dance number during the singing contest as an intermission number.. we danced get up..by ciara..
wee!!
10 days to go and it's kuya tatsi's birthday!!^__^
10 days to go and he'll be another year older than me..
so bale..
i'm 15 now..
and he will be..
19
aww..
anyways,,,,
i wanna to go to one of their gigs..
pero there's no gig na pede ako makapunta,,
kce it's far..
haha
anyways..i'll try to post as soon as possible..
ciao!
i'm so tired.. this week was so exhausting. we had a dance number during the singing contest as an intermission number.. we danced get up..by ciara..
wee!!
10 days to go and it's kuya tatsi's birthday!!^__^
10 days to go and he'll be another year older than me..
so bale..
i'm 15 now..
and he will be..
19
aww..
anyways,,,,
i wanna to go to one of their gigs..
pero there's no gig na pede ako makapunta,,
kce it's far..
haha
anyways..i'll try to post as soon as possible..
ciao!
the time was.. 11:49 AM
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